Within 48 hours of discussing exclusivity with C, I got asked out by two gorgeous women and had a female friend initiate a “how would you feel about mixing some benefits into this friendship” conversation.
What is this signal that women so quickly pick up on?
I don’t know what is wrong with it.
I know a dozen things off the top of my head that are right with it.
She is good to me. So good. She adores everything I do. She supports me. She likes who I am.
I feel like I should leave before she is too reliant on me.
I fear that if I leave, it will be T all over again, that I will regret pushing her away and that the reason I do so will seem stupid in hindsight.
Am I just trying to keep other options open?
Am I just staying for the cuddles and blowjobs?
WTF is wrong with me?
I don’t know what exactly changed between C and I to enable it, but I think I am starting to connect to her. Many of the same issues that were making em hold backa re still there, but, rather abruptly, I am starting to feel much more care and tenderness toward her than I was.
This translated into our playtime yesterday, and I began to call her “good girl” and “little girl” quite a bit. I shied away from dropping the “daddy” bomb mid-scene, but I talked to her this morning abotu it and her take was that I should have said it. We haven’t gotten into a deep discussion about what that means for her. I think that is somethign best left for after we’ve toed into that headspace a little.
